I too can be an expert.

I want to start the next world wide panic.

Let's start with a simple fact: somewhere between 250,000-300,000 people die each day world wide.

Now let's make an assumption: 20% of those deaths are due to unknown causes. This could be because of populations from poorer 3rd world countries that don't have money for autopsies, people from remote regions we are just assuming have died today, and legitimately mysterious deaths. We don't know if this 20% figure is correct, but we'll emphatically state it as fact.

Now let's give this 20% a name: We'll call them phantom deaths.


Every day a minimum of 50,000 people die from the Phantom Death. There is no cure.

Invite me on you're show, I'll make graphs. AND I'll even shout louder than your other expert guests so everyone knows I must be right.

The Phantom Death. It's scary, there's no cure, and it's coming for you.