Victors and Spoils

Victorsandspoils.com

Pure evil genius.

But they're downfall might be what makes them successful. This is the only place where decent creatives might be willing to work for free because of their connection to Crispin Porter.

Their first project (creating their logo) had 1,118 entries. And after browsing them, quite a few were awesome. 5 people got paid. So 1,113 entries went unpaid (most designers entered more than once I imagine). One person got a measly $100. And the winner got $1,000 still probably less than they would have been paid in a regular gig.

So the question is, how long will people be willing to work like this? If you work on five projects and never see a dime, or very little money, will you work on a sixth? Especially against such stiff competition. Eventually, and I think soon, the numbers and quality will diminish.

I imagine there will always be ad school and design students who figure they're not getting paid anyways, but how long can you survive on student labor?

Good luck guys, but I have a hard time seeing how this can survive for the long - haul.

Looking for a new cult

I'm looking for a new cult leader to work with to hone my marketing skills.

I'd be happy to give references but the last group set their ocean side mansion on fire during the Perseids. There were no survivors. They're all on a spaceship to galaxy NGC 6494. I hear it's nice there. Mission was a total success.

I can build you a small but very loyal following. I'm willing to do this work on a pro-bono basis. I only ask that if you are planning a doomsday cult please find a more creative way to indicate the end of times. These mansions are not easy to come by. They are beautiful and deserve a little more respect than to be burnt to the ground.

Thank you.

Fancy some grave dancing?

New product idea #1:

Six foot by 3 foot portable dance floor.

Just the right size for your standard grave site. (extra large options are available)

Handy for when that special someone you wish never was alive - isn't.

The best part? It's reusable.

Only 2 guaranteed ways to fight the signs of aging.

1: Die young.

2: Live a life so boring you may as well have died young.

Great acts in darwinism

The past month I have witnessed the same incredibly dumb act no less than 5 times: jaywalking with a stroller. But we should thank these people. Killing off your young is the ultimate in natural selection. And if you're dumb enough to do this, you're really strengthening the herd. So from me to you, thank you.




If only there was a way to kill off the guy who asked me for the time in front of a Starbucks in New York. He asks me for the time, I say '3 O'clock.' He yells at me saying I need to do better than that. So I say,'I dunno, a little after 3.' He grunts disapprovingly. I enter the Starbucks, the same one HE WAS EXITING, and there's a giant clock that says 3:04. Some people weren't lucky enough to have parents that jaywalked when they were little.

Everything I know about advertising I learned from a homeless man

Okay, maybe not everything. But I did learn one lesson.

If you're anything like me, you've lived in a large city and passed by panhandlers and semi-con artists on a daily bases without giving it a second thought. Or at least tried not to give it a thought. But chances are you rarely ever gave out money.

There was this one panhandler who used to sit on the Clark St. bridge in Chicago. The first day I passed him he had a cardboard sign that read something like: "Help. Severe case of writers block." I chuckled and gave him money. I turned around and more people behind me were giving him money. Then another day I saw a group of teens around him on the bridge, all laughing and giving him money. He was telling jokes, I don't remember what the were but they were funny, and probably self depreciating.

The lesson here, if you're asking for money, make people feel good about giving you money. He probably made 100x's what other panhandlers in similar locations were making. Those who try to con, or beg just make you either angry or make you feel bad, but chances are you'd just drop your head and walk away.


So this takes us to the worse ads on TV today.

Save the children: To which I can't find the link.


Save the animals



So thanks Sarah. I might have been in the mood to save a puppy today. But now, thanks to you, I'm paralyzed with grief. At least one less puppy was saved today. The blood is on your hands.

Some Rebranding: It's not going bald, it's a reverse mohawk.

Lesson 1: If you can get the kids to do it, it'll all be ok.

So if you're this:


This makes it ok:




But this will kill your movement - and no amount of PR can save you: